Archive for March, 2010

BOARD

March 22, 2010

On the eve of my english board exam..perhaps it wouldn’t be correct or as per the ‘108 rules of being a goodexcellentIITAIIMs student of indian ..wait south indian origin’, to read dilbert strips and check out videos on how to remove those cubes from a 3 by 3 rubik’s cube. (basically how to cheat) but ahh well….im past caring.

but back to the rules…which are imposed almost in every indian household or if you’re parents are nice enough every indian school and believe me..these aren’t just stereotypes..:-

1) Eat vendakai (lady’s fingers or okra is better i believe ) before maths exam.

2)Apart from vendakai you must be on a strict diet of thayir sadam ( curd rice) and coffee (when you are woken up by your over-anxious mother at 3 in the morning)

3)The Tv must be disconnected for an entire month…no..three months…much to the dismay of serial-watching pattis

4)your brain must turn into avial before the exam….its a sign of hardwork.

5)You should compare yourself with your neighbour,old man in the street,brick layer,patti,your father,your uncle,your classmate,your friend and enemies..you must outshine them! coconut oil to the rescue!!!!!!

6)beats the heat,oil in your head….says amma who makes you drink horlicks while you memorize the value of pi.

7)An ideal student has a name that is actually as long as the alphabet itself.

Venkatasubramaniam balakrishnamachari vishnusahasranamadeha muttal

8) his mother is one who sutthufies 10 million hanuman temples and does angapradhakshanam in the name of lord ganapathi.

9) All good students use only cello pen,apsara pencil and nataraj sharpener.

10) all students must, by the time they finish three exams turn into catastrophic mush-brain sociopathic introverts…and write senseless blog entries after that.

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